"All of 'em please Martin. Please please, pretty please with a cherry on the top!"
"Ok but only if you promise not to throw these ones out of the pram I am paying you squillions a year to sit in..."
"I promise, I promise! I'll be a good boy - honest"
"OK, there you go. Oops, you dropped your dummy now silly boy. There, that's better..."
I have to be honest, while I admire Lewis Hamilton's aggressive nature behind the wheel and would never wish to see him abolish it (contrary to others banging that drum) I am growing tired of his endless moaning after each race as he continues to throw his toys out of the pram.
As with all racing drivers, it is always the fault of another upon matters of contact on the circuit and while it has been hardly surprising to see Lewis adopting this stance in the wake of his troubled runs in Monaco and Montreal recently, his comments regarding the performance of his McLaren and of his title aspirations for the year are it is in bad taste.
Speaking after Sunday's European GP in Valencia where he finished 4th and Sebastian Vettel claimed a 6th win in 8 races, Hamilton said: "It's finished really. In the sense of the championship it's almost over already."
He then did all he could to garner support for his upcoming home race at Silverstone by declaring: "I'm not looking forward to it, I'm really not looking forward to it. I'll be going there as prepared as I can, racing as fast as I can, but we really might struggle." The PR department at Silverstone will no doubt have been raising a glass to those pre-race ringing endoursements...
However the 26-year-old clearly woke up rejuvenated on Monday as he posted on his official Twitter account: "To all our supporters, ignore what u read in the papers today. My team will never give up & I WILL NEVER GIVE UP!!!!
"Bring on silverstone, ur support will make a world of difference to us. I'm going to the factory now to do all I can with our team."
Trouble is Lewis, the papers only reported what you actually said so you cannot lay the blame at their door on this occasion. The Ali G gag after his Monaco debacle went down like the Titanic and his assessment of suitable places to overtake other drivers were highly questionable in the rains of Montreal so a safe game was necessary in Valencia. All the while, Vettel romped to yet another win in a team Lewis unquestionably wishes employed him.
Come to think of it, given his obvious frustration at the inability of McLaren to provide him with a consistent race-winning machine since his title winning campaign in 2008, is it any wonder he is unable to hide his displeasure at being unable to drive an Adrian Newey-designed winner?
He is currently a man ill at ease with himself, his team or the attitude of consecutive Race Stewards and feels his talent deserves more respect. Lewis' attitude suggests he believes he deserves a bye within certain areas of the sport and while his cavalier technique should not be discouraged,it can only be acceptable when applied with correct judgement.
In contrast to the adolescent attitude of his team mate, Jenson Button was also disappointed to have had a poor showing but notably failed to be defeatist.
"We had the fastest race car in Barcelona, Monte-Carlo and Montreal, but we didn't have the fastest race car here in Valencia today,” he said. “However, you can take it as read that we'll be working flat-out over the next ten days to do our utmost to ensure that we have as fast a race car as we possibly can for Silverstone.”
Sure, button also appreciates that McLaren have a lot of work to do to catch Red Bull, but every other driver out there is in the same boat but still they offer no comments of a similar nature to Hamilton.
The new regulations banning the 'off-throttle' devices from next Sunday's British GP could see Red Bull loose their advantage a little but will that be enough to appease Lewis? Who knows but it's going to be fun reporting what he does say after the race-but please remember, don't believe what we write, will you...
He then did all he could to garner support for his upcoming home race at Silverstone by declaring: "I'm not looking forward to it, I'm really not looking forward to it. I'll be going there as prepared as I can, racing as fast as I can, but we really might struggle." The PR department at Silverstone will no doubt have been raising a glass to those pre-race ringing endoursements...
However the 26-year-old clearly woke up rejuvenated on Monday as he posted on his official Twitter account: "To all our supporters, ignore what u read in the papers today. My team will never give up & I WILL NEVER GIVE UP!!!!
"Bring on silverstone, ur support will make a world of difference to us. I'm going to the factory now to do all I can with our team."
Trouble is Lewis, the papers only reported what you actually said so you cannot lay the blame at their door on this occasion. The Ali G gag after his Monaco debacle went down like the Titanic and his assessment of suitable places to overtake other drivers were highly questionable in the rains of Montreal so a safe game was necessary in Valencia. All the while, Vettel romped to yet another win in a team Lewis unquestionably wishes employed him.
Come to think of it, given his obvious frustration at the inability of McLaren to provide him with a consistent race-winning machine since his title winning campaign in 2008, is it any wonder he is unable to hide his displeasure at being unable to drive an Adrian Newey-designed winner?
He is currently a man ill at ease with himself, his team or the attitude of consecutive Race Stewards and feels his talent deserves more respect. Lewis' attitude suggests he believes he deserves a bye within certain areas of the sport and while his cavalier technique should not be discouraged,it can only be acceptable when applied with correct judgement.
In contrast to the adolescent attitude of his team mate, Jenson Button was also disappointed to have had a poor showing but notably failed to be defeatist.
"We had the fastest race car in Barcelona, Monte-Carlo and Montreal, but we didn't have the fastest race car here in Valencia today,” he said. “However, you can take it as read that we'll be working flat-out over the next ten days to do our utmost to ensure that we have as fast a race car as we possibly can for Silverstone.”
Sure, button also appreciates that McLaren have a lot of work to do to catch Red Bull, but every other driver out there is in the same boat but still they offer no comments of a similar nature to Hamilton.
The new regulations banning the 'off-throttle' devices from next Sunday's British GP could see Red Bull loose their advantage a little but will that be enough to appease Lewis? Who knows but it's going to be fun reporting what he does say after the race-but please remember, don't believe what we write, will you...